Like That Goddamn Sweater

Written by: AJ

I’m fast and jittery,

Uncertain hands fluttering about

Drawing pictures in the air;

Accompanied by waves of words

Caught in my throat

Rolling around on my tongue,

pushed unceremoniously into the open air,

floating in almost never ending spirals.

I move fast, jumping from thing to thing.

Never able to focus.

Yet for some reason I’m caught up on you.

Like that day last fall

I wore my favorite sweater

And while walking it got stuck on a fence.

Because I didn’t want to rip the sweater

and it was my favorite

I ended up stopping,

And you’re that fence

And I’m that sweater

Caught up on you.

You’re slow, measured.

You match me in passion

Yet take your time

You kiss like time is halted

Like my parents aren’t in the next room

Like we have days instead of stolen minutes

You are calculated.

I’m not sure if you’re afraid to let go

to lose control.

Perhaps you’re just in love with details.

I crave to know

Am I a detail in your life?

Or am I the greater picture?

I want to be the picture.

Like getting caught by the accidental flash

Of our first stolen kiss

I want you to accidentally make me

A small insignificant detail, into the picture

But like that fence that snagged my sweater

I’m terrified you’re going to rip me apart

Because that was a situation doomed for disaster

Yet you kiss me slowly

And hold me closely

Then you seem to forget me.

Why are you so afraid of commitment?

You let me see your shattered pieces

Glimpses of yourself

I collected shards of glass

Hoping to be able to glue them together

Yet you left gaping holes in your tale

And I’m like water rushing too fast

Trying to fill those empty spaces

Am I eroding away more pieces?

Are you being brought down stream

Is this, another quick thing

Maybe I don’t want to untangle that goddam sweater!

Please

I know how you sleep

I know how you like your tea

How you drink (way to much)

The story about your number for football

I know the real you.

I can’t be your first in most things

But I want to be the first to meet your mother

And if I can’t be the first for the rest,

I want to be the god damn last

Please don’t rip me apart

You know the strings

You need to pull to make me unravel

Like a meaningless piece of cloth

I labeled my favorite

Please tie off those strings

of mistakes and hatred

Please don’t leave me

When I think I’ve final gotten stuck

on something good

For one freaking time in forever.

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2 thoughts on “Like That Goddamn Sweater

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